The Light of Camelot
by EpicArwen
Summary: Set after 2x04, this is a short story about the immediate fallout of Gwen's kidnapping by Heingist, where both Arthur and Lancelot were there to rescue her. Based on cannon, with my imagination taking us off the beaten path just a tad. Primarily Arwen with mentions of Lancelot,
1. Chapter 1

Author's note: Set after 2x04, this is a short story about the immediate fallout of Gwen's kidnapping by Heingist, where both Arthur and Lancelot were there to rescue her. Based on cannon, with my imagination taking us off the beaten path just a tad.

Hope you enjoy! Would love to hear what you think so leave some feeback if you can!

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><p><strong>The Light of Camelot<strong>

She had been rescued and returned home to her beloved Camelot.

She was once again safe, with friends, and among familiar things.

Still, Guinevere felt oddly out of place.

As if everything around her were dark and suffocating.

Dark as the dungeon that had been her prison; as suffocating as the certain death sentence that had hung over her head not two days before.

She stared out the stained-glass window of Morgana's bedchamber and relived the events of the past few days. Her life – almost lost, almost won, then almost lost again – seemed a very fragile thing.

As did her usually stable emotions.

They were all jumbled up inside. Disappointment warred with relief. Anger with gratitude. Dreams with reality. And the memories she could not shake dashed in and out of her thoughts, like a silent thief stealing her confidence and whisking away her sanity.

Guinevere closed her eyes against the images that assailed her.

A gallant smile filled with hope. A pair of blue eyes, dulled with hurt. Bold, passionate words and daring, passionate actions. And two names that viciously vied for pre-eminence in her thoughts.

_Arthur. Lancelot. Lancelot. Arthur._

There was not enough air in the world to fill her lungs.

Or enough light to illuminate her heart's deepest truths.

"How are you feeling, Gwen?" Morgana's voice startled Gwen from her disturbing thoughts.

"Much better, thank you." Releasing a shaky breath, Gwen's smile was brief but sincere as she addressed Morgana. "And thank you for the bath, for letting me stay the night. For everything."

Sympathetic to Gwen's ordeal, Morgana gathered her maidservant – her friend's – hands in hers. "It was the least I could do after you sacrificed yourself to save me. I can only imagine how frightened you were."

"In truth, I've never felt so alone in my life. Not even when father died." Gwen confessed as she and Morgana turned from the window and made their way to a set of chairs by the fire. "I don't know what I would have done if you hadn't sent Arthur to rescue me, Morgana. So, thank you for that."

"I sent him? Is that what he told you?"

Guinevere nodded mutely, her gaze shifting to the flames crackling in the fireplace. Though the fire burned bright and warm, she felt a lonely chill settle in her bones. The memory of that moment left a bitter taste in her mouth. Unprompted, she expanded her response in a pained whisper. "His exact words were that he only came because you begged him."

"Well, that's a lie." Morgana scoffed.

Gwen's gaze cut sharply to Morgana. "What do you mean?"

"You know Uther. Even when I begged him for a rescue party, he wasn't willing to risk the lives of his knights to save a mere servant. And when Arthur agreed with him in front of the Council, I felt the need to confront him in his chambers with a few choice words."

Morgana offered Gwen a plate of fruit, which Gwen refused. Morgana placed the platter on the ornately-carved side table between them and continued, unaware that her audience of one was hanging breathlessly on every word. "Had I taken a moment before accusing him of being a gutless coward, I would have noticed that he was nearly packed and heading out of Camelot to find you."

A glimmer of hope sparked in Gwen's heart. "So, you didn't..."

"No, Gwen." Amused, Morgana leaned back in her chair with a proud smile. "Arthur was coming to find you whether I asked him or not. He only sided with Uther because he couldn't go against his father in public." She paused, her brow furrowing in contemplation as gazed, unseeing, into the fire. "Though I wonder why he didn't take the credit or the glory he deserves after such a daring and successful rescue."

A suffocating weight pressed painfully on Gwen's chest, against her heart. Her throat tightened and her dark eyes stung with fresh, hot tears as the new information twisted and turned in her gut.

"I am sure I do not know."

Even as she spoke the words, Guinevere knew the answer all too well.

_Lancelot_.

Yes, she knew the answer.

And though she was miles away from the danger of the dungeon, she felt the walls closing in on her just the same.

Closing in.

And extinguishing the light she'd once found in Camelot.

tbc...


	2. Chapter 2

**Hey all - thanks so much for the feedback on this story. I'm sure there are several ways in which Arthur could/would have responded in the days following Gwen's return to Camelot had the show given us that storyline. As they did not and because Arthur had a tendency to retreat to his room whenever he was really upset, I went in this direction so to give voice to his feelings and later to Gwen's. **

**Hope you enjoy. Would love to hear what you think!**

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><p><strong>Chapter 2<strong>

Three days had passed and Arthur Pendragon wasn't himself.

Feigning illness, he'd taken to his room and had shunned all public appearances. He'd missed council meetings. His knights went on with their training without him. His food was rarely touched and the only one that had seen or spoken with him was Merlin.

And Gaius.

King Uther had Gaius summoned.

"Well, Gaius. What have you discovered?"

"Nothing, Sire." The aged physician answered, as always when it Uther Pendragon's presence, with extreme caution. "A thorough physical examination has revealed nothing amiss with the young prince."

Uther contemplated this news then, as usual, assumed the worst. "Could his current state be the result of sorcery?"

"I think not."

"Then what is it, Gaius? Why is Arthur not...Arthur?"

"I fear, Sire, that the malady afflicting Arthur is one of the spirit."

"Meaning?"

"He seems...depressed, Sire."

"Depressed." Uther repeated before scoffing at the thought. "Nonsense. Arthur is the future king of Camelot. _My_ son. He knows that emotions are a weakness, and therefore, does not let his rule him. Depression is a malady he, as a Pendragon, cannot afford."

"No doubt you are correct. Arthur is a strong, rational prince and the people trust his judgment as they do yours." Gaius affirmed quickly in an attempt to deflect Uther's ire, while still making his point. "But even the strongest among us have a weakness, Sire. Perhaps Arthur has encountered his."

Uther grew agitated. "And what, pray tell, would that weakness be?"

"Only Arthur knows the answer to that, Sire."

Contemplating Gaius' assessment, a stubborn Uther came to a conclusion and issued an unbending decree. "I don't care the reason. If he is not ill, I want him at the breakfast table tomorrow morning at which time he will resume his duties to their full extent."

"Sire, perhaps it is best to let this run its course..."

Uther stood, towering like a tyrant over the court. "He will appear before me tomorrow or be thrown in the dungeon along with the rest of Camelot's useless and wayward citizens."

"But, Sire..." Gaius began to protest.

"My decision, Gaius, is final."

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><p>"Arthur, this is getting serious." Merlin declared to an unaffected Arthur Pendragon. "Your father is threatening to throw you in the dungeons. You <em>have<em> to snap out of this…this…whatever this is!"

"And how exactly do you propose I do that, Merlin?" Arthur turned from the window to address his servant, his generous lips turned down into a now-perpetual frown. "I have been a fool. And one that will be faced with that knowledge every moment I spend outside the walls of this room. The ache was bad enough before but now? Now, every time I see her walking down a corridor or standing quietly by Morgana's side, I will be reminded of just _how_ foolish I've been."

"I can't believe I'm saying this, but…" Merlin mumbled under his breath then made sure Arthur heard every word of his next statement. "…you are _not _a fool, Arthur Pendragon." Merlin huffed out his frustration. "At least not on_ this_ issue."

"No?" Arthur queried. "You were there. You saw what I saw."

"Yes, I did." Merlin confirmed. "But I'm not nearly as convinced of what it meant as you seem to be."

Arthur scoffed and turned back to the window. "Clearly, you are not accustomed to the ways of a woman."

"And you are not entirely accustomed to Gwen's." Merlin shot back.

"Merlin." Hands on his hips, Arthur's sharp tone, stance and clenched jaws told Merlin he was dangerously close to being tossed out of the Prince's bedchamber on his ear. "You can leave now."

"Arthur…"

"Now, Merlin. Unless you want me to find a vat of hot oil."

Despite Arthur's bluster, Merlin knew he was dangerously close to crossing that ever-present, imaginary line that could mean the difference between life in the castle or banishment forever. If he wanted to end this conversation with all of his bodily pieces intact, he needed to proceed with caution.

Gathering and releasing a calming breath, Merlin tempered his tone.

"Look, Arthur, all I'm saying is that Gwen is a genuine and honest soul that isn't prone to toying with a person's emotions. Whatever happened between you…whatever made you believe she shared your feelings…" With Arthur's confession on the quest to find Gwen, Merlin's curiosity on the subject had been sparked. He so wished to know what had occurred between the young prince he served and one of his best friends, but dared not ask. Especially not with the latest turn of events. "…then it was real for her too."

Anger slightly abated, Arthur's shoulders slumped in defeat. "And what if I just misinterpreted things? What if what I want is only what I want when all she wants is…him?"

"You wouldn't even ask that question if you'd seen her these past few days." That gained the Prince's full attention. "She's as miserable as you are, Arthur."

"And how do you know she isn't miserable because he didn't come back with us?" Arthur asked, then when an immediate answer didn't come, he added with conviction. "See? You don't."

"Only because I haven't asked her outright." Merlin shot back. "Is that what it'll take for you to snap out of this? The certainty of her feelings?"

"No." Arthur answered instinctively. "If it is Lancelot she really wants, then…there is no hope for me. And I don't think I want to know that."

"But Arthur…"

"And if, by some miracle, I am the one she dreams of, well…then that's a rather hopeless case as well. For_ both_ of us." Arthur shrugged helplessly then let out a groan of frustration, giving Merlin a mere glimpse of the turmoil raging in his heart. "Maybe it would be better for her if he is the one she cares for. At least then, one of us could be happy."

"Do you really believe that?" Merlin asked, surprised by the selflessness of Arthur's admission. "That things would be better if Gwen were with Lancelot."

"If she loves him, Merlin, then…yes. I do." Arthur answered without hesitation, though the pain in eyes belied the truth in his heart.

"And what about you? What about your happiness?" Merlin queried.

"I am destined to be king, Merlin. No one ever promised me a happy ever after."

Still convinced Arthur had not been mistaken about Gwen's feelings for him, Merlin pressed his case. "But what if you're wrong? What if Gwen does, as I believe, feel as you do and you could have that? With her?"

Arthur turned away and began to pace like a caged animal. "As I said before, Merlin, it's all talk. Nothing can ever come of it."

"But if she cares for you…"

"_Nothing_, Merlin." Arthur reiterated adamantly. "I have to find a way to _feel _that as much as I know it, or all may be lost." Arthur stopped pacing and spun to face Merlin, the wretchedness of his struggle so plainly etched on his face. "So, you see, as I am in rather a sorry state at the moment, it matters not where I reside – whether here or in the dungeons. No matter where I am, I am already imprisoned."

And for the first time, Merlin really did see.

He saw the impossibilities of Arthur's situation like never before. His destiny as king. His father's prejudices. The laws that that would never allow Arthur the happiness he so desired. But even more than all that, Merlin saw the depths of Arthur Pendragon's love for the worthiest of women. And his deepest fears that that love would never be returned.

"This is not at all like you, Arthur. You don't accept defeat this easily. Ever."

Sighing, Arthur turned back to the window, his gaze on the distant horizon as the sun began to sink behind the trees, casting shadows on the planes of his face. "This isn't like facing an enemy in battle or a competitor in a tourney, Merlin. This is so much more important than any of all that. This is about Guinevere's heart, her future happiness."

"And her happiness means that much to you?"

"It means everything." Arthur whispered then continued with a surprising question. "Do you remember what you said to me? That when I become king, I can change things?"

"Of course."

"Do you know that Guinevere said nearly the same thing to me once? Right after I told her my father would never understand…us." Arthur's eyes drifted closed and his voice softened in a way Merlin had never heard before. "It is from that moment, Merlin, that there's been a glimmer of hope – a light at the end of the long, dark tunnel between this day and that. Guinevere was that light. Despite what I know, how impossible it all is, I at least had her belief in me to light the path before me, to show me the way."

He swallowed hard as his eyes, dulled with weariness and pain, slid open once more. "And now, now I feel as if…" Arthur's deep sigh echoed against the cold, stone walls of his chambers. "…as if that light has been snuffed out. I know not what direction to take from here."

"Arthur…"

"Don't please. It is enough." Perhaps realizing how much he'd revealed, a suddenly stoic Arthur abruptly cut off any further discourse. "I'll work out a way to deal with this, Merlin. On my own."

"But your father's threat…"

"Let them come." Arthur stated simply, wearily. "For now, please…just go."

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><p>"Do you really think he would do it? Throw Arthur into the dungeons, I mean?"<p>

Still reeling from his earlier conversation with Arthur and the depth of feeling it had revealed, Merlin shrugged in answer to Gwen's question as he continued to add food to a platter he knew Arthur would dismiss without a glance. "He's done it before when Arthur defied him. At this point, it's a matter of the Pendragon pride. Uther can't bear to have anyone think his son is weak."

Gwen's agitated pacing stopped when she spun to face Merlin.

"Arthur is anything but weak. He is, by far, the strongest, bravest knight Camelot has ever seen. And he's certainly the noblest man I've ever known." A fierce Gwen stated. "Surely the king knows that about his own son."

A bit taken back by Gwen's strong defense of Arthur, and yet not surprised in the least, a witty Merlin-retort died on his lips when he saw the intensity in her dark eyes. Merlin, wisely, decided to let it pass. "Uther knows what he wants to know."

"Is Gais right then? Is there really nothing wrong with Arthur? Physically, I mean." Gwen worried her lower lip as she waited for Merlin's answer.

"He is not ill, if that is the question."

A deep, frustrated sigh filled the momentary silence. "Tell me the truth, Merlin, is all of this...because of me? Because of what happened when the two of you came to rescue me from Hengist?"

Merlin opened his mouth to answer then clearly thought better of it. He was certain that Arthur would not want him sharing all that he had learned in one short conversation. Even more than that, he was feeling suddenly, overwhelmingly protective of Arthur.

He gave Gwen a pointed look instead.

"Alright, that wasn't fair. I know as his manservant, his secrets are your secrets as well." Understanding Merlin's hesitation better than most, Gwen quickly devised a new tact. "How about this then? If, in fact, Arthur's current state is due to those events, hand me his platter and I will deliver his dinner to him tonight."

Merlin paused a moment in thought then slowly shook his head. "Gwen, I don't think that's such a good idea."

"Why not?"

"Let's just say…" Merlin chose his words carefully. "…that Arthur is at a very important crossroads right now. And, I'm sorry, Gwen, but to be honest, I'm not at all sure that a visit from you is what he needs."

"What do you mean?" Hurt filled Gwen's eyes.

"Gwen, I can't…"

"Fine. But if something I've done has brought him to this, I can't, I _won't_ stand here and do nothing." A determined Guinevere stepped up to the table. "Merlin. He saved me from the jaws of death. The least I can do is save him from a night in the dungeon. Or at least try."

Relenting with a sigh, Merlin started to hand her the platter then stopped. "Gwen. I've never seen him like this. Please…be careful."

"Merlin. Don't worry." Then without a question being asked, she wisely answered. "I know my own heart." She held out her hands. "Now give me the platter and leave Arthur to me."

tbc...


	3. Chapter 3

**Hey all - **

**Thank you so much for your reviews, support and patience on this story. I realize that at this point in the show, Arthur and Gwen were much more circumspect about their feelings, but I gave them both permission to not only give voice to their feelings (especially Gwen since I think she's the one who's feelings were most in question at the time) but to also be more hopeful of their future together than what they would have been at this point in the show. What developed out of that permission is below.**

**Hope you enjoy! Would love, love, love to hear what you think!**

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><p><strong>Chapter 3<strong>

A light knock on the door stirred Arthur from his surly and pensive mood. Half expecting a pair of guards at his door, armed and ready to block his escape should he dare try to evade the King's orders and half expecting his well-meaning manservant ready to dispense more unsolicited advice, Arthur answered with a resigned sigh.

"Come."

The door swung open then closed, and the soft pad of leathered feet against stone could be heard advancing into the room.

"Ah, Merlin. Back again. You seem to have a problem hearing properly of late." Arthur's droll welcome floated to the door from the corner of his room where he stood leaning against the wall, staring out the stained glass window. "You might as well take the food to the most unfortunate in the lower town. You know perfectly well I'm in no mood to eat."

"And why is that, milord?"

Arthur's head snapped around at the gentle voice he hadn't expected. He unfolded himself and straightened, an unconscious reaction to her presence. "Guinevere. What are you doing here?" He tossed an accusatory glance at the door as if it alone had the authority to bar her entrance. "Where's Merlin?"

"There was an emergency and Gaius needed..." Guinevere began her rehearsed excuse, paused, shook her head then placed the tray laden with food on the table separating them. "No. No, that is not right. I cannot do this."

"Do what?"

"Say what I need to say to you by starting with a lie." Gwen explained cryptically before her unyielding, steady gaze met Arthur's. "There is no emergency. I asked Merlin to let me bring your dinner to you tonight."

Arthur crossed his arms in front of him and leaned back against the stone wall. He relished the sharp cold at his back. It stopped the wave of heat that threatened to sweep through him at just the sight of her.

And what a sight she was.

The lavender tunic fitted with a floral bodice emphasized the enticing curves of her shapely form and dipped low enough to expose smooth, mocha skin that made Arthur's mouth water. Long, spiraling curls framed her delicate features as the candlelight found in the depths of her dark eyes a place to dance and shine. And the softness of her lips only reminded him of gentle smiles and teasing laughter. And how once, in an unguarded moment when Arthur, the man, was overcome with desire, they'd yielded so deliciously to his kiss.

It was a yielding he would never know again.

At least, that's what he'd convinced himself. What he'd based his carefully chosen course of action on.

But now, with her here?

Her very presence threatened to throw off the precarious balance between heart and mind that he'd managed to acquire since last speaking with Merlin but a few hours earlier.

Arthur forcefully pulled his gaze away from the face that haunted his dreams and caused his heart to clench in the sweetest of pain to ask a question he wasn't at all sure he wanted the answer to.

"And why would you do that?"

Arthur wasn't the only one drinking in the sight of the person before him.

Gwen's hungry gaze took in every detail, passed over every inch of him – from his solid stance over the broad shoulders and impressive chest that were barely restrained by a thin, red tunic, up the smooth column of his bronze neck to his impossibly handsome face. It was there that a kaleidoscope of butterflies unleashed a painful riot in her stomach. For it was there that his features were sharpened by lost sleep and his marbled eyes were grayed with a harrowing, unspoken struggle. It was there that Gwen saw the deep wound that had been inflicted.

And it was there where she saw the last embers of a dying hope.

Gwen's heart sank like a boulder in a lake. She didn't know if she could fix this or if it was beyond her to heal what she herself had caused. Doubts filled her heart and mind as Merlin's words of caution came rushing back to her.

_Arthur is at a very important crossroads right now. I've never seen him like this. Please…be careful._

But even in that moment of uncertainty, there was one thing Guinevere did know. With Arthur's heart – his future, and that of Camelot's – on the line, she at least had to try.

"Because I needed to see for myself that you are not truly ill."

Arthur let her answer sink in, daring not to hope for the reason behind or the frankness with which she uttered such a statement of fact. No, for his sake – for both of their sakes – he needed to end this audience before it began.

"Well, now you have." Arthur commented, his voice cold and dismissive. He turned back toward the window, effectively issuing a silent command. "You may take the food with you when you leave."

And just like that, it was over.

The door that had once been thrown wide open between them – the door that allowed for prince and servant to exchange coy smiles and secretive glances, to share unspoken dreams of a future yet unseen – was closing at a frighteningly quick pace. Gwen felt a desperation well up inside of her that she'd never known before. Not even when her life was already lost behind the bars of Hengist's dungeon.

It was a desperation that drove her forward as she took an involuntary step around the table in an effort to break through the barriers between them. "But Uther has declared you'll be in the dungeon by tomorrow's eve if you do not appear before him in the morning."

"I do not care." Arthur's impatient sigh filled the room. His weariness of the subject, and the incessant concern of those around him, showing in his posture, his expression. "Now, please, Guinevere. I do not wish to be rude, but if there is nothing else then…it's best if you go."

Prickles of tears stung her eyes. The servant she had always been warred with the woman she was becoming. She'd been dismissed by the prince and, by all rights and courtly decorum, should leave. She even made a reluctant effort to do so. Her feet moved as commanded toward the door, but her heart forbade her when her hand closed over the door's iron handle.

The silence of the room was in deafening contrast to the thundering of her heart. To all of the emotions that had been colliding inside of her since that night. The hopes, the fears. The impractical impossibilities. The reasons not to dream and the dreams themselves that would not be silenced.

She meant what she said when she told Merlin that she knew her own heart.

Now, she only needed the courage to claim it.

Her hand slid from the door's handle to drop heavily by her side as she began to speak, her words a lifeless echo of the recent past that had brought them both to this new degree of separation.

"I had lost all hope. Hengist made it clear to me that my death was imminent. I knew the King would not pay a ransom for a mere servant and I dared not believe that you would defy him or risk so much. Not for _me_." The tremor in her voice rippled through the air and hit Arthur with a force that caused his chest to rise and collapse with an involuntary shiver. "Despite what passed between us, we both know it can never be. _You_ said as much. I _know _as much."

"Guinevere..."

Determined to finish what she'd started, Gwen turned toward Arthur, her gaze averted and distant. "And then, unexpectedly, there he was. Offering me hope and freedom and a chance to live..."

"Guinevere, please stop." Eyes shut against her words, Arthur's voice was pained. "There is no need to explain."

"Yes, Arthur..." Her stubborn gaze met his with fierce determination. "...there is."

Arthur pushed himself away from the wall and advanced towards her slowly. Cautiously. "No. There isn't. You have feelings for him. Strong feelings."

"Do I?"

Her question stopped him cold. As much as he wanted to believe, to hope, in the doubt implicit in her question, he couldn't risk being that open again. Not when he'd finally found a way to end his torturous struggle. "Yes, you do. That much was very clear. And I don't blame you, Guinevere. After all, he is a brave man with a noble heart. If anyone could be worthy of you…it is he."

There was a pause as she let his words sink in. And then her lips began to tremble and her eyes shimmered with film of unshed tears. "Then why is it that he is the one that's gone, but _you _are the one I'm missing?"

"Guinevere?"

The cautious hope that sprang into his eyes and echoed in his voice moved Gwen across the room without thought or effort. Suddenly, she was before him. Engulfed in his warmth. Gazing into the depths of his eyes. Able to breathe for the first time in days.

"Since that day, you have withdrawn from all of us, Arthur, and it's as if...as if a darkness has fallen on Camelot. Everyone feels it. Everyone senses something isn't right."

A bittersweet smile touched his lips. "You think I'm acting like a spoiled prat whose favorite toy has been taken away, don't you?"

"No. I know that I have caused you pain." She instinctively placed her hands on his folded arms and appealed to the future king inside the man before her. And in doing so, sealed the knowledge in his heart that she and she alone was worthy to be his queen. "But that is no reason to shut yourself up in your room and pretend there isn't a kingdom out there that withers a little every day that you choose to hide and nurse your wounds. Camelot is dying without you, Arthur."

"I hardly think a few days away from court can cause such an effect." A doubtful Arthur commented as his gaze faltered.

"Then you know not how you inspire your own people. The hope you give. Arthur, _you_ are the light people look to in dark times." Guinevere stated with conviction. "And these past few days? Your men…they train, they go through their paces, but there is no fight in them. Your father rails without objection, and judges without a reasoned and just voice to counsel him. In the past two days alone he has thrown half a dozen of _your_ people in the dungeons for infractions that should have only required an afternoon in the stocks. Among the townspeople there is an unsettled calm. As if a storm is about to break, and there will be no one to stand in the breach, to champion their cause, and I..."

Gwen breathlessly broke off her impassioned report, her own confession stuck behind a sudden and immovable lump in her throat.

"And you...what?" Arthur's whisper was full of a hope that pierced Gwen's heart and prompted an answer beyond her control.

"The future that I believe in…the one I see each time I look at you…it is no longer clear to me. And without that clarity, without _you_, this place is…suffocating. Without you, I dread each moment I walk these halls or stand in the same room with the man responsible for my father's death." Words came quick as confession followed confession. "For one fleeting moment Lancelot was my hope when I had nothing but fear to hold onto."

"But _you_, Arthur…" Her hands drifted upward to gently capture his face. "…you alone help me breathe, day in and day out, and you give me a hope that stretches far into the future. It is the hope that one day I will live in a Camelot that is as honorable and just and true as the king who sits on its throne. A man who can right everything that's wrong in our world."

"Oh, Guinevere..." Arthur's eyes drifted closed as he covered her hands with his. His chest rose and fell with a shuddering breath that seemed to shake him to his very core.

The struggle that Arthur thought he'd put an end to, began again in earnest. For in that moment, Arthur Pendragon knew without a doubt that true happiness could be his. He knew it like he knew his own name. He also knew complete and utter destruction awaited him if Guinevere lost her future, her happiness, her choices because of him.

Gwen continued, unaware of the struggle gripping Arthur's heart like a vice. "I would do anything to undo the harm I've done and make this right between us, but I know not how. Arthur, please, tell me what to do, and I will do it. I am yours to command."

He gently removed Gwen's hands from his face and held them against his lips for a long moment as Arthur, the man, fiercely warred with Arthur, the prince. As selflessness battled self-interest. As doubt and fear was in hand-to-hand combat with hope and love.

And for a moment, doubt and fear claimed victory.

Arthur let Gwen's hands slide out of his, as his gaze met hers. The sadness in his eyes caused Gwen's heart to constrict in her chest. "What if it cannot be undone? What if what you seek is...impossible?"

Gwen swallowed hard at the question, at the distance she saw growing in his eyes. "Then let me bear the burden of that pain alone and hope...wait...for the day that impossibilities vanish." Gwen's heartfelt answer was delivered with straightforward simplicity. It made Arthur love her even more. "In the meantime, do not let my failures be the cause of Camelot's undoing. _Please_, Arthur, come back to us. Be Camelot's light once again."

Arthur swallowed back the urge to gather her in his arms and never let go. Instead, he offered her the very compromise he'd made with himself. The plan that he was ready to put into motion.

"And what if I could change things now?" Arthur inquired softly. "What if...I could give you the future and happiness you deserve?"

Hope sprang through Gwen's dark eyes. "But how?"

Side-stepping Gwen, Arthur crossed the room to his desk, grabbed up a parchment and returned to her. "Here."

Gwen slowly took the offered parchment as confusion claimed her expression. "What is this?"

"It is a letter of inquiry." Arthur explained as he watched Gwen unroll the scroll and scan the words he'd so carefully drafted not a half hour before, a compromise made between head and heart. One that would give Gwen the ultimate choice. "I'll send it with my fastest riders in every direction. I can find him, Guinevere. I can bring Lancelot back to you. All you have to do is say the word."

The hurt etched in the gaze that rose to meet his was so palpable Arthur considered ripping up the missive and withdrawing his offer. "Have you truly not heard a word I've said?"

"Yes, Guinevere, I've heard. But I have also seen." A wise Arthur answered. "He _can_ make you happy. With him, there is a certainty I cannot give you. Not now. Perhaps not ever." His hands closed over hers as he gazed into her eyes and offered her something a mere servant could never dream of having – a prince's unconditional love. "Whatever your future may hold, Guinevere, I want the path you take to be of your own choosing."

Gwen let his words sink in and take her over. Saturate her heart. Permeate her every thought. "You would do this for _me_. Sacrifice your own desires, your own heart…let me choose. Even if it meant choosing another."

"Yes. I would." Arthur answered with a conviction that registered in the deepest blue of his soul-filled eyes.

Gwen swallowed hard then pulled away from Arthur, her mind in an unexpected whirl of thoughts and emotions. That Arthur would be so selfless, that he would go to such lengths to secure her perceived happiness spoke to a depth of feeling that was beyond comprehension.

Except, it wasn't.

Not when Arthur Pendragon was the man in question.

Squaring her shoulders, Gwen spun in the direction of the nearest candle and, without hesitation, lit the parchment on fire.

"Guinevere, what are you doing?" Arthur rushed forward to stop her, but Gwen blocked his way with a gentle hand against his chest.

As she dropped the burning scroll onto a nearby silver platter, she watched as it curled into itself, the words blackening to ash. "I don't need certainty."

"But…"

"I don't." Gwen repeated then turned to face him, her heart shining through her eyes. "I just need you."

Their gazes held for a long moment as hearts rapidly aligned. As dreams flared once more. As their mutual claims on each other solidified into a beautiful 'someday' yet to be realized.

And then, his lips were on hers, stopping her next heartbeat and stealing the breath from her body. She responded instantly, instinctively, with a kiss filled with sweet, tender emotion and a passion she'd never known before. Slow and deep, each caress, every probing connection, wiped away doubts, one by one. All the insecurities and fears, the struggles and pain of the past few days faded away to nothing.

The kiss ended too quickly, and just in time. A breathless Gwen pulled back to gaze up into his eyes with complete, open trust. Unabashed admiration. Endless hope. And a shadow of something deeper and infinitely more precious.

With a sigh of the deepest contentment, Arthur leaned his forehead against hers as his hands cradled her face. "Oh, Guinevere, you've done so much more than make things right between us. But now, now, I need to ask even more of you."

"Whatever it is, Arthur, ask and it shall be done."

Arthur pulled back to look deeply into her eyes, making her a solemn promise. "Don't ever doubt again that I will come for you. Don't think I won't defy every obstacle to reach you. That I won't risk any danger. You say that I'm the light people look to in dark times. That I am your hope for the future. Well, Guinevere…" A smile spread slowly across his lips. "…_you_ are _my_ light. _My_ hope. I _need _you to believe in me. Believe and wait, as I will, for the day when impossibilities vanish."

She smiled then.

It was a smile to rival a thousand suns.

"Your wish, milord, is my command."

And in that moment, Arthur Pendragon knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that as long as he had Guinevere, the light of Camelot would never fade.

The End


End file.
